Words of knowledge come on occasion.
Here’s one:
“DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM THAT WHICH AFFLICTS YOU.”
We all have do this from time to time.
There are certain situations and also people who — knowingly or unknowngly (usually unknowingly) — bring us toxicity.
It doesn’t mean to distance yourself from expiation nor right suffering nor sacrifice — not from the crosses God gives you — but from the crosses others give you.
Many are those who through their weakness or sin or incompleteness create unnecessary crosses for themselves and others.
How does “distance” comport with love?
No commandment is greater (than to love others), and in fact love provides the way to distance. Another word of knowledge comes as a solution, a prayer, a mantra to repeat through the day: “I WANT TO LOVE, I CHOOSE TO LOVE, I DESIRE TO LOVE,” over and over in all circumstances until love flows from you to others.
If you do that, you’ll be surprised at the smile you now flash at others and the glow in your eyes and the warmth that comes into and from your heart. Do it when someone aggravates you at a red light or at the line in the supermarket.
When you’re having trouble with someone or a negative thought about another person arises in your mind, replace it with the words: “I WANT TO LOVE,” and repeat it until you feel exactly that.
It’s when we see others as God does, through the eyes of love (“I want to love, I desire to love…”), that we create the right space between us and those who “afflict” us, who cause us pain, who provoke turmoil; it’s when we do it that we see ourselves clear to a resolution, are able to diplomatically yet deftly and strongly keep others in their proper places and roles, developing courage instead of allowing them to rule the roost and control the situation, to cling, to our detriment. It is when they are in control, sweeping us into their orbits, that they afflict us. We channel their darkness.
We are not meant to be close to everyone — just to love them. There’s a difference.
When we truly love, even in distancing, there will be no insult. It doesn’t mean cutting someone off. It doesn’t mean hurt. It means developing the inner courage and strength and maturity to prevent another from manipulating and controlling you — from befogging you.
Love guides. Love knows. Love is the genius of wisdom. Love knows how to buffer without causing insult to those we must buffer against. Don’t let others control you by laying guilt on you. Stand your God-given ground.
It’s when we allow emotions to overtake us — aggravations to burrow in, anger from past hurts to erupt, or when we react to slights or insult — that we succumb to those whose spirits (sometimes demons) afflict us. The spirit of control, as opposed to that of correction, is a spirit of witchcraft.*
People have spirits around them. Spirits attach. They also detach. They can jump like fleas, when a person who afflicts us controls us. Darkness enters.
That brings us back to the question: how are we supposed to love and at the same time “distance ourselves from that which afflicts us”? Aren’t we supposed to carry crosses?
We are — but not crosses that drain us without end, that sully the spirit, that create antagonisms, and that don’t stop due to the shortcomings, and even sin, of another.
Through life there are many people with whom “on paper” we are “supposed” to be close, friends, acquaintances, coworkers, even relatives, and yet who inflict unnecessary wounds. No cross that comes from darkness is the right kind of cross. The crosses we are called to bear are the ones sent by God.
*[As the great expert on deliverance, Derek Prince, once wrote, “People who habitually use manipulation or intimidation to control others open themselves to the bondage and influence of a demon of witchcraft. If this happens, they will be unable to relate to anyone apart from these tactics. It will be no longer just the flesh at work, but a supernatural power that can bring whomever they control into a condition of spiritual slavery.”]
[resources: Derek Prince’s Blessing Or Curse] and Michael Brown retreat, Long Island, November 11]