The gift of calm means two key things: patience and rising above irritation. Nurture transcendance.
Step back before stepping into something (such as a Christmas argument).
When matters in life are rubbing -- or cutting -- against what you want, pray and go with the flow of the Holy Spirit instead of allowing frustration to carry you.
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Be careful in these fantastically partisan divisive times to nonetheless search for the truth, amid the verbal clamor.
There is currently an epidemic of what they call "cognitive bias" and "information asymmetry."
In other words: you only want to read, hear, think, and talk about what you think the truth and facts to be or should be.
Maybe you're right. But search out the full picture, before making a determination and getting all worked into a frenzy about it.
That's called discretion.
As a priest was saying the other day, most of the decisions in life have to do with pain or pleasure (avoiding the former and seeking the latter). We choose pain or pleasure.
What it should be devoted to instead, he said -- our lives -- is searching for the truth and choosing that, whether it brings pain or pleasure.
It's the truth that sets us free, not what we want the truth to be.
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The worst lies are the ones we tell to ourselves.
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We also choose whether to win or lose. On miracles:
They say I will believe it when I see it.
It should be: I will see it when I believe it
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It's also the time of year to exercise kindness and (as stated above) patience.
Don't get enraged at everyone who disagrees with minor aspects of what you believe. This may be especially critical -- in the currently hyper-charged divisive climate -- at the dinner table on Christmas Day or New Year's Day (never mind when the wine is flowing New Year's Eve). Perhaps it's one reason voting is secret.
To think we are totally right -- totally and absolutely right, in every matter, and that everyone else is less intelligent or loyal or faithful if they don't fall completely in line -- is not the most efficient route to humility.
Is a matter worth risking a friend or insulting a relative, we have to wonder: Is it worth it? Am I changing anyone's mind? Or simply arguing (and denting relationships, often permanently)?
Silence is usually a wise decision (learn from the mansuetude of Silent Night; take guidance from the Manger).
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Patience leads to peace.
God honors longsuffering.
Nurture patience... Nurture patience... Nurture patience. A Catholic "mantra."
Only if we can wait for certain uncontrollable eventualities or words and situations to pass, and ignore irritation, can we rid ourselves of anger, a root sin that helps lead to purgatory.
[resources: What we Take To Heaven]
