From the mailbag (anonymous):

“I walked into a New Orleans restaurant to have dinner tonight and was greeted with do you and your guest have your vaccination cards with you.”️

 

Hostess : Hello.

  

Patron : Hi, table for two, please.

  

Hostess : Sure, and your name.

  

Patron : Tracy

  

Hostess : Great. And do you and your guest have your vaccination cards?

  

Patron : We do. Can you tell us who our server will be?

  

Hostess : Um, looks like Tom will be your server tonight.

  

Patron : Great. Can you show us Tom’s vaccination card?

  

Hostess : Um…

  

Patron : And also, can you provide me with proof that Tom is not a carrier of HIV, Hepatitis A or B, or any other communicable diseases such as VD?

  

Hostess : Um..

  

Patron : Also, we would prefer not to be served by someone who is on or uses recreational drugs such as marijuana, cocaine, meth, fentanyl, etc., so if you could provide us with Tom’s most recent tox screen, that would be great.

  

Hostess : Um… Let me get the manager for you.

  

Patron : That would be great, thanks…….